This is a tough situation. Is it possible that due to your son's issues you've given him whatever he wants, creating a spoiled and entitled adult? What steps have you taken to deal with his disrespect towards you? Personally I'd refuse to engage with him when he's being abusive. It's hard to tell from your article if he is genuinely hurting or craves attention and this is the best way he knows to get it. I hope you can work this out and your son can find the inner peace he lacks.